In an attempt to get to the "ideal" weight that was accepted by society as perfect (even though I had just needed to maintain because my BMI was ok), I was constantly on a diet and trying to lose weight.
Hubby and I in 2006 before we were married |
So preoccupied with losing weight was I, that I had forgotten to love my body. Two kids later and looking back, I wish that I had that body again. The irony is how hard I'm working now to get that body back. The body that I used to not like because it was not "perfect"!
Someone probably told this babe that she was ok but she was too busy trying to lose weight to listen *sigh* |
Obviously I had a hard time with pregnancy. I gained so much weight because my appetite became ferocious. Yet I was not allowed to diet and do strenuous exercises because of the baby. I hated how I looked and so never took any photos of myself pregnant or posted any photos on Facebook (which, if you know me, is very out of character for me). I thought I would look fat in the photos you see.
The only photo of me pregnant with my girl was at the Pixar exhibition in 2010. The hubby brought me because I was such a big fan. I only agreed to one photo with Woody because I love Woody!
At 7-8 months pregnant at the 2010 Pixar exhibition at the Singapore Science Centre |
I'm actually really thankful to the hubby for taking this photo of me! At least I have one photo to show my girl that I was actually pregnant with her!
After I gave birth to my girl, I saw all the photos that mums had posted on Facebook of their pregnant bellies and regretted not daring to take such photos. I should be proud of my pregnant body, fat thighs and all!
So that's what I did when I was pregnant with my boy. I took as many photos as I could so that I would not live with regrets!
I had gained just as much weight when I was pregnant with my boy as I did with my girl (23kg each!). After losing the majority of it, I still had 5kg from each pregnancy left to lose! I tried hard to watch what I ate but it was really hard as I was breastfeeding and hungry all the time.
I did pilates at least once a week though and that had definitely helped me to tone and strengthen my body (even though I still weighed the same).
Doing pilates on a reformer at Pilates Fitness every week for more than a year now |
It's such a struggle to lose the tummy weight and I kept lamenting how I will never look like how I did before I gave birth.
Then one day I had a revelation that if I keep focusing on the weight, I will never treasure my body for what it is and what it has accomplished (I gave birth to 2 babies for crying out loud!). For all you know, one day when I'm
Me with the girl in Batam, 1 year after I gave birth to Baby Boy |
Despite being borderline overweight and still carrying my "baby weight" on my tummy, I will celebrate because well, I CAN DO A DAMN PLANK for more than 25 seconds. I'll probably look back on this time 10 years from now and wonder why I thought I was fat. I should embrace my curves and wear a body shaper (those from Marks and Spencer are way better than Spanx) for my tummy.
After all I am only 30 once and they say 30s are the best years of a woman's life (you have both the strength and the money to fulfill your dreams)!
Besides, just in case my kids ever think that they were adopted, I'll have the tummy, wider hips and saggy boobs to prove it!!! *laughs*
P.S: *pffff* to all of you who got your pre-baby body back after a few weeks by simply sneezing. You and all the Gisele Bundchens can kiss my ass! *hmmph*
P.P.S: I'm kidding (not). Hahaha.